Gallery 64: Jeff Goes to Pittsburgh
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A visit to PNC Park [left] and a near-death experience while balancing on a
guardrail high above the city were highlights of my recent trip to Pittsburgh
with my friend Dee and his family.
sights of Pittsburgh [with the city in the background].
Dee learns from my mistakes [and my water pressure-inflicted brain damage], and
chooses to plug his nose on his ride down the slide.
still is Dee's son, Grayson, who disguises himself as a floatation device to
altogether avoid his turn at going down the slide.
At first, Grayson's Mom, Colleen, encourages our shenanigans as Grayson and I
splash about with some fun pool toys. Later, her mood changes when we
suggest that Grayson's sister, Daisy, is the perfect size to substitute for a
beach ball that we punctured during an aggressive pool volleyball game.
Grandma Nancy unsuccessfully tries to convince the small diva that there is no
such thing as the Sports Illustrated Kids swimsuit issue.
Chopping Mall: That's me looking especially [re]animated outside of the
Monroeville shopping center where George A. Romero filmed the classic Dawn of
the Dead back in 1978.
lieu of stalking their victims, flesh-eating zombies have become lazy in the 25
years that have followed, instead using Monroeville Mall signage to lure their
Here's a zombie now! Luckily, we are able to incapacitate him using the
"bungee cord to the head" technique ...
another great method would be to apply the two-person "human vice," as
Dee and his Mom, Flo, demonstrate here. While Grayson seems happy in this
picture, moments after it was taken, his head exploded from the pressure.
With the very photogenic Grayson out of commission, Dee's sister, Tay, is taken
out of mothballs and ordered to "increase her level of cuteness" when appearing
in family pictures.
"Polly want a WHAT?!" Here's what happens when good mascots go
bad, following the Pirate Parrot's ugly encounter with a disgruntled fan.
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